[2 of 4] Trauma and Disorganized Attachment for the Spice of Lifer

©2019 by Briana MacWilliam Inc.

  • Briana MacWilliam

[2 of 4] Trauma and Disorganized Attachment for the Spice of Lifer

Dearest Subscribers,

Today, I would like to share a video with you regarding trauma and disorganized attachment, for what I call the “Spice of Lifer.”

Disorganized attachment, or what I refer to as a “Spice of Life” attachment style, is typically the result of trauma, whether it is “big T” trauma--like rape, physical abuse, warfare, natural disaster, severe neglect, etc.-- or “litte t” truama--which is considered developmental trauma.

Developmental trauma is perhaps more subtle, but chronic and cumulative. This might look like constant criticism and humiliation, and other forms of emotional abuse like gaslighting, or relentlessly attacking someone’s character. I might also include bullying in school, body shaming, sex shaming, and other crisis of development.

A member of our private Facebook community asked me to expand more on the experience of the Spice of Lifer, as it pertains to avoidance and anxiety, and so I delve much more deeply into it, in this video.

Essentially, for the Spice of Lifer, they experience both anxiety and avoidance, but it's at a much higher volume; the momentum of swinging back and forth between these polarities is so intense, it creates tremendous tension, often referred to as “flooding” or emotional disregulation.

And this is typically because the early attachment figure--who was supposed to be a place of safety and comfort--was also a source of threat.

A few subtopics you will find in this video:

0:10 Pain and pleasure pathways for the Spice of lifer

3:30: Little T trauma vs. Big T trauma

5:15: Raising your consciousness

9:15: The notions of the Law of Attraction

To learn more, check out this video here https://youtu.be/7Htmc7vJ6Ns

Want to learn more about attachment?

What if there were a simple solution to your most painful relationship problems?

Gain insight into your relationship problems in 4 questions, when you take this attachment styles quiz!

Take the quiz: http://bit.ly/4LuvStylesFB

Warmest regards,


Briana MacWilliam ATR-BC, LCAT

Licensed and Board Certified Creative Arts Therapist

Author, Educator and Reiki Practitioner



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